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Should I tell my friends about the mess that I'm in?
Awhile back, I took my car for a drive and was looking at my phone when I should've been watching the road. I ended up going through a red light and collided with another car. Luckily, no one was hurt, but I was charged with reckless driving.
Yesterday, I received my sentence. The judge decided I should spend ten days in juvie (I'm 17) in order to learn a lesson about texting and driving. I'm being allowed to serve my sentence incrementally, on weekends. This is so I can keep my summer job. Basically, I'll be spending every weekend in juvie until the end of July.
I still can't believe I got myself into this mess. Why was I so stupid? Why couldn't I have just waited until I was home before responding to that text from my boyfriend? I wish I could take it all back, but I can't. I'm stuck with having to deal with the consequences of my decision, as much as that's gonna suck.
None of my friends, not even my boyfriend, know about my situation yet. I've been too embarrassed to tell them the truth. Plus, my parents have been urging me to keep this as quiet as possible. I've considered just making up some excuse for why I can't hang out on the weekends, but I also don't like the idea of lying to everyone. Maybe I should just own my mistake, as humiliating as it'll be once it hits the rumor mill. What would you do if you were in my shoes?
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its hard for a person who has never been in your situation to imagine what they would do, especially something like this. What I can do is give you some things to think about and see if any of it helps. If your parents have asked you to keep this as quiet as possible, it might be best to have a talk with them first. I am sure you are still stunned and didn't ask the parents any further questions such as why they want it kept quiet, and who they are okay with you telling if just a few like a handful of friends. The problem with telling someone else is that even if they mean to keep it quiet, since they aren't the ones in the situation, they might make a slip and say something to someone else and then that news gets broadcast on every-ones cell who go to the same HS, even if its summer break. If the parents are embarrassed for others to find out, find out what you can say if you are asked why you are not available. Be thankful though that this accident didn't end up in injury or death for the other cars passenger(s) because that would be a much harder sentence. I would say this is actually quite lenient. So you are blessed, even if you made a mistake. But don't get angry with yourself, just chalk this up to a learning experience. Some people never learn from their mistakes and everyone makes mistakes. The goal here is that you learn from your mistake and never repeat it.
You could of course say nothing until a friend asks and then tell them whatever your parents are comfortable with. And ask that friend to keep it secret even from the rest of your mutual friends. A possibility is if you could ask the parents if they are okay with is you giving an answer but being vague about it. You might say that you got into trouble so you can't see them on weekends for the next month. Let them imagine you are grounded. However if they ask specifically if you are being grounded, you don't have to answer yes or no but simply make a comment like "Grounding really sucks." That way you don't have to lie to your friends. Your comment again leads them to believe you are being grounded. If asked what you did to get grounded, you say you don't want to talk about it. Then they know they have to wait to see you again.
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