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about how he thinks
so, there is this guy at school i joined this school this year and now its only a month left but i've had a crush on his since half the year he's 11th nd im 10th and once i noticed him i looked at him and when i do he almost always looks back or i sometimes catch him looking at me even while he's talking to his friends and i have no idea if he like me because he doesn't smile while looking at me, well neither do i but that's because im nervous thinking he might not smile back and well people tell me im pretty but gosh i have no idea if he'll ever approach shoukd i follow him on instagram, should i approach and how? i really like him
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A relevant story from when I was a kid:
My parents rented a cottage in a beach town. There were others cottages spaced out here and there amongst the pine trees on the property.
When not at the beach, my parents would read or whatever while I played outside. Within a day or two after we arrived another family arrived with a girl about my age.
We were there for two weeks and they apparently were also, or maybe even longer. Anyway, we played outside SEPARATELY until the day before we were to leave for home because neither one of had the courage to approach the other.
My father finally noticed the girl and encouraged me to "be brave and go talk to her." I decided that I would do it and we hit it off immediately. On the day that my family was leaving, she hugged me and said that she wishes that I had come over sooner.
I think of that from time to time, MANY MANY years later.
I hope that your takeaway from this story is that you should "be brave and go talk to him." You've nothing to lose and who knows, maybe everything to gain.
Good luck with it!
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About him looking back, there's an instinct all humans are born with, the ability to sense when someone or something is staring at you. You have probably felt like someone was watching you at times and when you turned and looked behind you, yes, someone is looking at you. So since you look at him, he'll feel it and look to see who is looking at him. And that's probably why you don't catch a smile since it was just curiosity.
One more thing, about looking or staring without smiling, gives the other person a creepy feeling. Think of a time when you are out and about and you sense someone staring at you that you don't know.They seem to pop up everywhere and just stare but dont smile. Wouldn't you wonder if the person were some kind of psycho? I know most people don't likke when the starer doesn't smile. No smile translates in our brains as the opposite of a smile, meaning 'not approachable, not friendly, could be mean, a loner, someone with bad intentions of hurting you somehow. That is enough to keep most people from approaching someone who is always staring at you.
I know you both aren't total strangers, and this means knowing you are fellow students of the same school but you still probably don't know much or anything about each other.
So you'd have to go to him, better if a time when he is not with a group of buddies so they won't be able to tease if you walk up to talk to him. If you have him in any classes, then think of something you have observed in him. Examples are being a good listener in class, very funny, having a great laugh, how he dresses, kind to others, very artistic, and so on. So for an opener, use something you have observed. I'll use the name Brian. "Hi Brian. You probably noticed me looking at you sometimes. I just thought it was best to let you know I wasn't some sort of creep. I have noticed (mention trait, even if its just how he smiles) and I like that. " Then once you are talking, ask a question that can not be answered with a yes or no because often after answering, the questioned person doesn't say anymore and the conversation stops. A simple question like "How do you like our science teacher?" if you share the class or if you need an opening statement and do not have him in any classes, make up something about him reminding you of a cousin of yours and it doesn't have to be his looks but maybe personality or how he talks. He doesn't know your cousins or if you have cousins near by. But if he does start a friendship with you, it's best to not start out with a falsehood, just own up to it and let him know that you just felt you had to meet him and couldn't think of anything else to say. If you're wondering if its okay for a girl to approach a guy first or ask him out, yes, in this day, it is. In fact, it takes a lot of pressure off the guy if he is just as scared as the girl is about asking. Guys may not obsess about their looks or if they are good enough to attract a girl to the same extent girls do, but they do have the same thoughts bug them. Lastly I want to mention something I learned after I grew older but wished I'd known when I was in H.S. There is such a thing as chemistry. There are two kinds, the chemistry to be instant friends, and the instant romantic chemistry. You are not close friends with everyone in school for that reason. Some people you like but can't explain why. Others may say and do all the right things but you just have no interest in being friends. The same goes for love and romance. The only sad thing is that sometimes only one person feels a chemistry but the other does not. You can't tell over texts or computer or phone if there is chemistry, that is determined in person. I can't explain in detail but it has something to do with our olfactory bulb (you can look that up) having to do with our sense of smell. I am not talking about odors you can easily pick up as a human. This is more like what a search and rescue dog does, sniff a scent and follow it to the lost person. So the reason I go into all this is so that you don't feel terrible if a guy doesn't seem interested in you, even as just a friend. It won't be you or that there is anything wrong with you, just that he doesn't feel any chemistry. Thing is, Most people don't know that there is such a thing, and figure we just don't like someone. So you can approach with confidence and know that you are a girl worth knowing and being friends with but you won't know if he feels chemistry also. So if he rejects you, that will likely be the reason. Young people don't know what to think or say if they don't feel this chemistry thing they don't know even happens and so their minds may have to justify how they feel and they will try to find something they don't like or make it up, like "You're too shy and quiet for me, I don't like how your voice sounds...odd stuff like that but do not pay that any mind because in many cases, it's all made up. Keep up your confidence and know there will be special guys for you to date until one day you meet the one you will spend your life with.
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