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Husband Refusing To Get Help
A few months ago my husband went into the hospital because of pancreatitis. The doctors said it was caused by drinking, and he was going through severe alcohol withdrawal. Thankfully he recovered, but they said he might not be so lucky next time. My husband comes from a family of alcoholics. His mom and two sisters are bar-tenders and they all have a problem with drinking too much. When he went in the hospital they couldn't possibly accept that it was the alcohol that caused it. They kept saying that they don't know how he got sick, and that maybe someone even poisoned him. I showed them the toxicology report which showed that nothing was in his system except alcohol, but they still don't believe it. They've been telling him it's ok to drink. Now 3 months later he's back to drinking, and he's starting to complain about pain in his stomach again. The doctors said he may not survive if something like that happened again, and I cannot believe he's drinking again. I'm pushing him to get help but he keeps saying that drinking won't make you sick because that's what his mom told him. I really don't know what to do and I'm scared for him. We're in our mid 20s so I thought he would be mature enough to understand how ridiculous that sounds. How can I help him? I love him, but should I just let him be and move on with my life?
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It would be terrific if he joined Alcoholics Anonymous but since he is already stubborn about seeing a Dr., chances are he would refuse that too.
I wonder whether you knew before you married. that his family background was alcoholics? If you knew, I would wonder why you went ahead with marriage. If you did not know, it would seem you didn't know him well enough before marriage. I do hope that if you learned anything, that it was to take your time and wait on the marriage until you really know your guy. Since everyone has free will, yes even to do wrong or stupid things, that is their right. And no one can 'make' a person do anything that is against their will. So it would seem that you and hubby are at an impasse. And that means that without his cooperation, there can be no improvement. It would seem he is in a hurry to die or doesn't care if he does. I can't tell you what to do as the final decision is yours. But I will say that it seems the only choices you have are to either become a widow or become a divorcee.
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