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Confusion with a boy
So, I like a boy. He seems to have a lot of interest in me, and I like him too. But here’s the problem. He says he likes someone else, but also shows that he likes me as well. I’m confused and he’s confusing my brain. I truly don’t know what to do but I like him a lot
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Well, liking a person is what starts the journey to becoming friends. While friends either a romantic/sexual attraction starts to grow, or is present at the beginning. If this boy likes you and even several others, he may only be ready for friendship at this point. The best purpose to dating is to find out what you like and don't like about a persons traits and personality and breaking off with anyone who is treating you badly or acting badly consistently--the kind of stuff that kill a relationship. Then when you choose someone to date again, make sure the next is better than the last one. The long term, steady dating is once both have found someone they like enough that way. Now I made friends easier with guys than women all my life and I am female. I see having male friends only, as a good thing, especially when young and starting the dating and couple thing. A close male friend can help you find info on how most guys are geared to think, what they say and so on. A male friend can help interpret if another guy is interested in you romantically, what certain words or actions mean.
Just ask him if he would like to be friends. Then wait to see if anything happens. If nothing happens, you can always try saying this: We have been friends for a while and get along really great there. SO I was wondering if we would do well as more than friends. What do you think?
you must not forget to ask what he thinks, as this is his moment to tell you He doesn't have those feelings or if he does, he'll agree you both should try being more than friends.
Good luck!
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The thing is that he's genuinely interested in you but it may not be a boy/girl relationship he's looking for. Maybe he sees you as someone he really wants to be friends with and platonic. He's probably got a deep connection or wants one with you but not romantic at least not now. That could change.
I think what you need to do is cultivate that friendship first and foremost and really get to know and understand one another. That's where lasting relationships start. The girl he likes now may be short-lived. There's going to be girls coming in and out of his life but if you're the one constant in his life it might eventually dawn on him.
Put it this way you're where you need to be. Things will evolve and it's best to live in the moment with him and keep building on your relationship with him because things can and do change. When you are a teenage boy or girl for that mater you don't have a lot of this relationship stuff figured out yet.
I would be respectful of him and his relationship with the other girl as as Steph said below wait and see what happens. At some point in the future you can let him know that you have been right under his nose the whole time and make him aware of that but the timing just isn't right for now. Be present in his life though.
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He can and does like more than one person, at least you and one other. At least he is honest with you, and that's a plus. Exclusive relationships will be in your future, just not now, yet, or at least, with him. As for what you should do? Bide your time. When you are young, relationships tend to come and go very quickly. Meanwhile, be your natural, friendly self, don't worry so much about him, keep busy, and either he'll eventually become more available...or, he won't, and life will go on !
Good luck, Dr. Stephanie
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