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I need advice to talk to my ex girlfriend whom I left in my hard time and m
I want to propose my ex girlfriend again becuase I breakup with her when I was not at good mental state
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
First, you may wish to apologize to her and to try explaining that you were not in a "good mental state" at the time you broke up with her.
Be prepared to do a lot of supportive listening, while she tells you how she feels, if she's willing to do it.
If you were upset enough to break up with her, do not expect her to be okay with your proposal. Your mental state appeared to be unstable at the time you broke up, and therefore untrustworthy, even now, from her point of view.
Instead of proposing, how about doing whatever you need to do to achieve and maintain a "good mental state" now and in the future. This is more important , now, and in the future, than another proposal just now. Without more information, I could not advise you on what you need to do, exactly.
From your "ex-girlfriend's" point of view, she would be very wise to avoid accepting any proposal from you now, until you can become more stable and mentally healthy.
Good luck, good wishes, Dr. Stephanie
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When you were not in a good mental state, did you tell her something of why before you left? If you did not and just left her, that is a very hard thing for any person, man or woman to get over, the not knowing and the grieving the loss. So in that case, I can not say any words from you now will make a difference. Unless you plan to never marry, dating a girl in step one in finding out if a person is someone you can trust be strong for but also lean on, in tough times for you. That is what a marriage is. You promise to be there for each other through better times and worse times. When one is having a crisis, they should be talking to their partner, even a girlfriend. Lets say you told her and she couldn't handle the fact you were having a crisis and left you . . .that would be conditional love, basing their love on only good times, and not caring when you are sad or hurt or depressed, and so on. Unconditional love is the one that should be in every couple relationship, every family. Home should be ones safe place. When you left, you didn't give her a chance to show you if she felt conditional or unconditional love so now it may take much longer to find out. What about her? Would you feel 100% sure you want to marry someone who without warning just left you for a while, even if they felt they had a good reason? I would personally see that as a potentially unreliable person, not knowing if and when he would take off again. If someone like that happened to me, I might only give him a chance to date again, if he would start talking to me about his day every day, not just the good things but the bad, your worries if any and so on. I certainly would not acceptable a proposable for marriage. Any girl who would accept marriage after what happened, is probably more in love with the idea of having a wedding rather than in love with you. You do not want to ask her to marry IF she agrees to talk to you. But you can go ahead and do whatever you want anyways and blow your chance.
If she will listen, you apologize first and then explain what happened, what you were thinking as even I don't know what was going through your head.
There are many marriages that lack unconditional love so when something tragic happens, instead of getting closer and having only each other during a crisis or tough time, they have nothing when the worst happens, like losing a child. Both blame the other and split up after that. So explain yourself well and better have to share what was going through your mind. If you see what I am saying and how wrong it was, you will have to give her time to see how you handle the next crisis and that may be a long while off.
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