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My best friend is bisexual.
I have been best friends with this girl for 3 years. We have had the best memories, she is the sweetest, most caring person I have ever came across in my life and I love her to death!
We got to know each other at work, we are both teachers. I was a 1st grade teacher and she was in Kindergarten. It was my first time as a 1st grade teacher. As silly as it sounds, we both wanted to work together and so I decided to try working in K for a year with her because we had the option to do that. (we live in an arab country btw and I am half American but she is pure arab)
After 1 year of knowing one another, we started working together on the 2nd year. We had the best year together, I love her so much! She is really my best best friend. I have other best friends (childhood ones) but she is the first one I became best friends with at 25. She is almost 30.
Now, on our 3rd year together at the same school, we were both forced to teacher separate classes and have our own assistants.
We were both really unhappy but knew we had to grow in our own careers and so we did. We stayed best friends during the school year, but then I realized she was getting super close to this new girl she met. Now, usually, i'm not the jealous type of person- AT ALL. I never once got jealous if any of my best friends met new people. However, we were both so extremely close and talked about how we literally have never met anyone the same as each-other and so the feeling of jealousy started to magnify when she met this new friends of hers.
I just want to mention that I have a boyfriend that I have been with for 4 years. I am extremely inlove with him, I am 100000000000% straight and have NEVER been interested or attracted to any girl in my life. She is just a very special person to my heart. I have 3 sisters that traveled and so she became my new sister. I depended on her in so many things and she did as well. We helped eachother through the worst situations. So automatically, I have become really jealous of this other girl. The girl was with us at work and always tried to get super close to my best friend. Eventually, they became "close" even though this girl knows that me and my best friend are super close. She is also a really nice girl ( I have no issue with her except for the fact that I felt like she was super clingy, trying to be best friends with both of us at some point but leaning more on my best friend because she felt like she was giving her more attention) My best friend texted her a lot, made her feel super super close to her (which eventually made me feel really jealous) I wont lie and say this didn't cause issues in our friendship, it did only because my best friend always talked about how jealous she would be if i ever met any other friend and like we made a deal that we would always be close and nothing would ever come between us. Now this girl tried really hard to get close to my best friend and was pretty much obsessed with her for the longest time. I used to get so annoyed because anytime we wanted to hang out, the girl would always stick to my best friend as if she was apart of our little group (which annoyed me)
I know many of you may find this childish, but its my first time to ever expierence any jealousy towards my best friend. I have always been the jealous type over my boyfriend (which is normal to a certain extent, if healthy)
But anyway, my best friend kept complaining saying that she doesnt know why this girl wont stop being all over her, so she decided that since it causes us to be a little awkward with one another, that shes gonna stop texting her and talking to her so much. She eventually stopped texting the girl back gradually, would stop being so nice and sweet with her. I told her that wasn't nice and that she should just be "normal" with her if she doesn't wanna hurt her feelings and act normally like I do with her (which is text from time to time, see how she is, laugh, joke, etc) and be normal. But she told me that she wants to do that and its the right thing (so that the girl doesn't think she cares about her way too much and expect them to be best friends)
Recently, she fessed up and told me that she feels a certain way about this girl, and she thinks that the girl feels the same way. I was really confused at first but then I tried to be understanding and asked her a bunch of questions to help her figure it out (because she kept saying I feel SO confused, and i have weird feelings towards her, and its not the same feelings i have with you-- your my best friend but I feel like i see her in a different way , like i have FEELINGS or something)
So basically, after a long long talk and conversation, we think she might be bisexual, and I think the girl feels the same way about her because we texted her from my best friends phone while we were together and she said she felt the same way.
Now i guess they are gonna consider being together "in private" because its not okay for them to be bisexual in public.
PLEASE dont judge me and say I am childish but.. I feel SO EXTREMELY jealous. I know shes my best friend and I should be happy for her for liking someone and for realizing that shes bisexual, but I CANT help but think that this is the exact same girl that i was so jealous of, that tried to get close to her and be her best friend- Now a million things are going through my mind. They are probably gonna hang out all the time, do things together, be there for one another, have their own little private relationship and i'll feel so left out. I KNOW its non of my business and that i need to grow up, I know that i need to be understanding, i know that Im wrong for feeling this way, and that i need to be supportive like she is with me and my relationship, but I dont know how to get over the jealousy and work through theses feelings. I have never felt this upset about a friend before, and I keep telling myself that im gonna go out with other people so I dont feel like my life revolves so much about my best friend and her love life now. I need to focus on my own life and my own relationship and let her have her own. its just so hard to let go of the fact that... this is the same exact girl I was jealous of.
Any tips, advice?
No harsh comments please :D Thank you!
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