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Should I just move on from this friend?
So long story short I had this friend and we had a Snapchat streak. Then she goes on her Snapchat story saying “she’s done and shes leaving social media and ending all streaks” so I messaged her and asked what was wrong and she said she doesn’t wanna talk about it and I told her I’m here if she needs anything she said “Ik” so literally 30 mins later she goes back on social media and posts like she didn’t have a mental breakdown. She also killed our streak, but the next day she sent me a snap so I was confused and just opened it then sent her one back and then she stopped sending me them. So it made me to think she sent that by accident and that she’s actually still doing streaks but ended it with me. I also noticed she’s friends again with this guy she had a fight with and part of the reason why they fought was because of something I didn’t even tell him but was involved in what she did. I messaged her asking her what I should do on my bday she said “idk I’ll talk to you later I gtg” she used to never have to leave convos so quickly. I think it’s jusy affecting me because Snapchat is how I stay in touch with her now that she ended the streak it’s like she doesn’t care.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Well, from what you said, I am pretty sure there's nothing you've done on Snapchat or what you wrote that made her act like this. In the convo you said you're there if she needs anything. The fact that she didn't close all down and went back on line means she is not sure of what she wants to do. That and stress are common things to make a person come across making irrational decisions, not keeping to what they said. Another thing is that she may not want you to see something she does that she feels you won't approve of or worse, talk to her and try to give advice when its not asked for. So I agree with the other advice giver that it looks like she is distancing herself. When a friend starts to do this, all you can do is give them the distance they want. Even if she if offended or mad at you for a reason imagined and made up in her head (that happened with 3 of my family members to me) all you can do is give her space. Periodically down the road, you text a hello, was just thinking of you, nothing else. This lets her know you're not made and willing to stay in touch or become as you were before. In my case it took months or almost a year with one family member before they willing began to talk and keep in touch, however with no explanation or apologies at all. YOu may have to expect this too, especially if she is confused, stressed, undergoing some change in life that she feels others may not approve of. She may end up going so far down a dark path that she never reaches out to you again. All you can do is pray for her, don't buy her, let her be. It is hard, I know. There is no way to make an unwilling person to be a close friend, same as it goes for couple relationships, you can't make an unwilling, uninterested person want you all of a sudden. There is no way because we are all born having free will and some use their will to resist things like a good friendship. So I suggest more like once a week, just writing her a note on line or however. If no response, take it to once a month. If she closes out all media she is on, then you have no choice.
A good true friend will confide in their close friend, even when they don't see eye to eye on things, as long as both feel they can share whats on their mind without fear of humiliation, betrayal, being put down, having a different choice or plan shared when they didn't ask for help or advice. So apparently she either doesn't feel safe that way with you, and it doesn't have to be your fault, or she had changed as a personality quite a lot recently so that she really doesn't feel anything in common with you to remain friends. This actually does happen quite often. A gal I was close to in School I am no longer close to. It doesn't matter that we had our own families and lived states apart, but I grew and changed so much as a person that I no longer had the same things in common with her and could not share freely of the things that interested me now because I knew she wouldn't approve. If I just hinted at reading books on some of these hobbies or interests as a way to feel where she was at, she was alarmed already. Nothing bad hon, just the usual things that people disagree on like politics, religion and what a good relationship is, divorce, etc. In the meanwhile, don't wait around for her to respond back. Find a new friend to add in to people you like who treat you well in return.
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I think she might be intentionally trying to distance herself from you. Therefore unfortunately, I think you should do the same. I know it can be hard especially since this might of come as a shock to you but if you believe she's sort of over the friendship don't beat yourself up about it too much. If she misses the friendship she'll reach out to you. If not, just move forward. Trust me, genuine friends are much better to have around. Good luck
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