|
I need a new job
Hello, I am 24, female and I am a paraprofessional in a school district. I apologize in advance, I'm sure this is going to be lengthy.
I started this job last August (2017), I started with a child for a couple of months but things didn't work out with him, he broke my thumb and had to get sent to a different school for emotional support. I was given another child who had very extreme anxiety, he could not go into his classroom at all, something triggered him (he didn't ever tell anyone what that was) but we all knew that there was no way we were ever gettin him in there. So, our last resort, he was signed up for cyber school. He did his classes online, in a small room that is located in the office. I acted as his teacher, I also graded all of his work, kept all logs of his behavior and I was utilized to get him into school when he couldn't get out of the car in the morning. Probably did a lot more than what my job actually called for and paid but it kept me busy and I really felt like I was making a difference with him.
Now, I still have the same boy, he is in fifth grade and he is fine! He comes to school, he goes into the classroom, he participates in class, he goes to special, he rides the bus to school in the morning now, he does everything as completely expected and everything he was not able to do last year, he is completely crushing this year! With that said, he does have some bad days but we all do so that is completely expected. However, the thing with this year is that when he has a bad day or he looks sad getting off the bus or something, the principal takes him, puts him in her office and works through his problem with him. So if he's having a bad day, it could be two or three hours until I at least am finally made aware that he actually is in the building, he's just been with the principal. Now, I'm not saying she shouldn't do that but I am saying that I should at least be in the room with them. Instead, the principal tells me that I should be in class taking the notes for him on everything that he has missed while he was out! I did not go back to college and get my degree to be a fifth grader again, I think it is completely unreasonable that I am made to take his notes for him; when any other child misses a class, it is completely up to them to get what they missed and complete it (I know, they are a little bit different, circumstantially).
Here are a few examples that really have ground my gears lately:
1. The one day, he had come into school but apparently it looked as if he was overwhelmed or upset at something that had happened on the bus that morning so the principal brought him into her office. After about two hours in her office, she came into his math classroom and pulled me out, he was standing in the hallway. She said that he was nervous to go into his homeroom to hang his backpack up in the closet because he didn't wan to disturb the class so the principal made me take his backpack into the room. When I came back out, she said that he forgot his math binder so she made me go back into the classroom to get his binder. When I came back out, she prompted him to head into the classroom, he didn't move, so she asked if it would be easier if I didn't walk in with him and he didn't say anything and she literally said "Okay, I'm going to dismiss Miss. _______ then!" and told me to go back into the room like I was only needed to get his things for him and that was it, I was so so so irritated that that happened, like I was something completely disposable and it's not my job at all to calm him down and get him in the room.
2. This just happened today - he was upset this morning, I had asked someone that rides his bus if she had seem him on the bus that morning and she said yes so I was assuming that something happened and he was pulled so I expected it. His math teacher went to go check on him (since we've noticed that he usually misses math) and when the math teacher came back into the classroom, he said that the child I work with was just sitting in the office playing with putty and when he had asked the principal what was going on, all she said was "he won't talk to anyone so we're letting him cool off" and that has been after about an hour's absence. After lunch, his math teacher caught up with me in the hall and asked if he had completed his math homework from the previous night and I told him no so we have all been thinking that when he doesn't do his math homework, he doesn't want to go into math class. His math teacher told me to not give him homework anymore. I brought that up to his case manager and said we should just do a trial period, if he doesn't get math homework for two weeks and doesn't have a melt down, then maybe we can narrow it down to that being a possibility. His case manager said we should cut the amount of homework in half, as that is what has happened every other year. I liked that idea, since homework is preparing him for junior high and the real world anyway, I brought it up to the principal in passing that we have all been thinking that it is homework. She told me that she wanted absolutely no changes until she can find something constantly happening. I told her that this was the third time that he didn't want to go to math after he consequently didn't do his homework and she was stunned that that has been happening, she said she's been "keeping a log" every time he isn't in a great mood and what a trigger could be and she never knew that him not doing homework has been happening frequently and all I thought in my head was "had I been allowed in your special little meetings like I'm sure my job description says, then I would have told you that".
*Also, I feel it's important to note that the principal last year is a different principal than this year!*
All that to say, I am starting graduate school (online) on the 24th and this job is good for working with my school and I had already promised that I would be back for this school year so I can't bail now but I think when this school year is over, I want to look for another job... especially because they told me that I would be moving to the junior high with this same kid that I have now and I know that in the junior high, they will not care at all and everything will fall on me to keep him on track and that will definitely be a lot on me. The problem is, I was anticipating doing summer school this summer coming up because I took last summer off and it really did a number on mental health, as well as my bank account. I have to let the head of the education department know if I want to do summer school by October. My fear is that, I will tell them that I don't want to do summer school and then when the time comes, I won't have another job and I will be unemployed. I was planning on giving myself a few months to look, like starting in February, hoping to get a job by June. I was even saying to my mom that maybe I could just transfer to being a substitute, work when needed and then focus on my schooling when I am not working, but I was thinking about getting flack from this principal that I left my kid to do something else in the school, yada yada yada.
I guess I just really want advice for all of this - am I blowing things out of proportion? Should I start looking for another job entirely? If it is another job, it would be part time so I could do college as well and it would be in my field so I could gain more experience. Do you think I should just transfer positions? Am I dumb for telling them no summer school? Maybe I could tell them yes to summer school but no to the following school year?
If you made it this far, I thank you kindly and appreciate anything you have to say!! :)
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Work & School category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Job Searches?
Good Lord, what the heck is your degree in? Because it sounds like you are simply a caregiver with a possible glorified title. School is mentioned but I assume you are not a teacher per se but some kind of child psychologist perhaps or some thing along those lines. The school is not set up for kids with special needs. Those needs are disruptive to all the rest of the kids and for the teachers. This kid needs a psychologist. If you are supposed to be helping children adjust mentally to whatever, then this is not the job. All they hired you to do is not help him mentally, anything but that. Getting his things when he can't enter a class is SOOOOO ridiculous. He shouldn't even be at this school. If an adult has a phobia or phobia's like this kid, they wouldn't be able to cope in the world and would likely be seeing a mental health specialist to help overcomed their fears so they can work and live in society. Does this poor kid have to wait until he is an adult to get help? He needs it now, not a go fer, fetcher, a caregiver who does everything he can't handle. You know what that is dear? It's called enabling. The school wants you to enable him to stay stuck where he is at. They have fooled you or you have fooled yourself into thinking that he is really getting better but it won't last until whatever is ailing him mentally is dealt with. This is like a scab growing over an injury. Looks like healing but underneath, you find the scab is covering an infection. Some one did not do the step of cleaning it well enough and now there is pus. This kid is like an injury filled with pus and you are the scab, covering for him. What he needs is not a scab but treatment of the underlying problems and what you are doing does not help and the school officials who do not have degrees in psychology obviously, are not helping him by assigning you to cover for him. I was a care giver of the mentally ill for a while. All I can say is that what you are doing sounds a lot like what I was doing for adults and I didn't need a degree for that. He may not be mentally ill but unless the memories, or trauma or fears, all having to do with his mind and how he thinks, is still going to need a mental health professional. He wont' get better until given the right treatment. I mean really, this is like saying, treat infection by rubbing dirt into it. So as you can see, this got me all riled up too. You are not blowing things out of proportion hon. You have been played with like a chess piece. It is an unfortunate thing. The school system of today, is shit compared to what it was when I was in school. If thats the way they want to operate the school, but you really want to help others, then this is not where you can do it. They are unlikely to change their F***ed up system, so you either remain as glorified caregiver or find work closer to whatever your degree is.
]
More Questions: |