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Why cant I get my boyfriend to have an orgasm ?????
So, I'm 18 years old. I've had sex with two previous boyfriends. I started to have sex with my current boyfriend two weeks ago. As we are doing it I noticed that it was taking quite a long time and I was getting exhausted !! After 2 and a half hours doing it I stopped to ask if I was doing something wrong. He looked like he was enjoying it, he was moaning normally. We went on for almost another hour until he was done. Since I stayed friends with both my EX's I kinda asked them if I was THAT BAD in bed...both said I was great so WTF !? Is this normal for guys ? Does it happen or could it be a medical condition ? I'm not ugly or fat...I'm not worshiped in school but after asking this to my girlfriends they said I'm at least a 7...Soooo, what could be going on ?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Trouble Reaching Orgasm?
Razhie is right; you two need to communicate better. The key to good sex even great sex is communication. For a guy any guy to hold off for that long every time says he has either great control or he may have other issues. The average length of time for couples to engage in coitus is abut 6 to 8 minutes for the first intercourse. Longer for the second depending on the recovery time of the male and even longer if the male is able for a third time.
To maintain an erection for much longer than he is doing is even unhealthy for him. Four hours is, with the aid of those little blue pills he may be using, longer than he should do so. They is advised that if an erection is maintained for more than 4 hours to seek medical treatment.
A question just popped into my head. Is it possible that he is popping a little blue pill so as to impress you? If so he is taking them for the wrong reason if he is able to get an erection without one. Abuse of these pills can be harmful.
He is not only hurting himself he may be harming you. You are needing to stay lubricated and stretched that long is I would say painful as well as exhausting. You really need to talk to him for his own good. If he is not using a pill or a desensitizing cream then he really needs to see a Urologist.
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A guy maintaining a full enough erection to have sex for 3 1/2 hours without ejaculating is indeed a rare bird. An hour would be a true marathon for most blokes, and they'd have to work really hard to delay their climax that long. Still, if neither of you are worried about it, there isn't a problem I guess. I wouldn't take it as a slur on your looks or technique. I'd say if he can hold onto it that long there wouldn't be a lot anyone could do to over-stimulate him method-wise. I'm a bit surprised you're not feeling pretty sore in addition to exhausted... andhe must be in good physical shape. I'm a bit stumped actually. If the only worry is that you're not 'doing it right' I'd say dismiss that idea. If you're otherwise happy with the arrangement, best carry on. And if it's a deliberate act of sheer will and self-control, you could try telling him that even the most demanding lady would be satisfied with about half that duration. Only other suggestion might be that excitement is sort of contagious....so you might try 'overdoing' it a bit yourself on the excitement front...and see if he gets carried along with it when you feel you'd like him to finish off. By 'having sex' you do mean he's actually fully erect, inside and 'pumping away' (sorry if that sounds a bit blunt!) don't you? Not just that you're spending 3 1/2 hours 'together' and enjoying yourselves as it were? That wouldn't be any where near so unusual after a couple of weeks of the relationship, where you will tend to be all over each other...most of the time! Even if he's ejaculated a number of times earlier, a guy will still tend to reach 'climax' in the muscular spasm/reflex sense...although there may be very little semen actually released. And sheer fatigue will tend to prevent a guy from getting another erection eventually...just like the way even an insomniac will eventually sleep when the body says 'Enough!' I don't honestly feel my answer is a very good one at all here...but I'll post it anyhow. Only thing I am convinced of is that it's nothing you're doing...or not doing. The physical attraction must be there, or he wouldn't be having sex with you, or would lose interest (along with his erection & urgency) during the act. A 7's hot when your girlfriends award it I reckon...so no worries there. Best wishes mate.
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Look, orgasms aren't something you 'give' someone else. They are a physical functions, and different people's bodies function differently.
You've got to talk to your boyfriend about this is more detail. It is unusual for a healthy young guy not to reach orgasm relatively quickly, and he might be embarrassed to talk about it (or maybe he had masturbated a dozen times earlier that day...), BUT if you don't talk about it together, you'll both be miserable and have a lot less fun in bed.
So ask, gently, but clearly, what is normal for his body.
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