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My boyfriend and I have sex but I never reach an orgasm
My boyfriend and I have had sex more than once but I never orgasm what should I do to orgasm so he will feel like he's good and I will feel better after having sex. 14/f
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Maybe give some free advice about: Trouble Reaching Orgasm?
I'm not dismissing lightly something that has clearly bothered you enough to seek advice about. But listen, you're only real 'problem' here is slightly unrealistic expectations. I assume, and indeed hope that you're boyfriend isn't a very good bit older than you. So you can't really expect him to have the knowledge, experience, patience and restraint to bring you off just yet. Especially as something that will just 'happen' during the penetrative part of sex. Also, friends of a similar age telling you about their orgasmic exploits may simply be mistaking little 'peaks' of pleasure during sex for orgasms. And you're thinking 'Hey! Why aren't I coming??' Try not to get fixated on finding a written guide to orgasms, get to know your boyfriend and teach him about you. Step at a time mate, it'll come in time. You're well 'ahead of the pace' anyway, age-wise. So don't worry yet!
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You are probably going to disagree with what I am going to say but read on anyway. For I will give you some information I shouldn't. On the basis of the horse has left the barn there is no reason to lock the barn door.
Ever hear the expression that our bodies are finely tuned instruments. Well they are and they react differently than someone else's and to different situations.
For a women to enjoy sex she needs to feel not just a loving relationship she needs to feel truly loved. She needs to feel safe and secure while having sex and she needs to be comfortable. This means she needs to feel they won't be walked in on by parents or observed by others while having sex. Take any of this away or fail to supply any of the above and it becomes a mechanical act to satisfy the man.
On the other hand give a guy a board with a knot hole in it and he can get off. He needs little to no stimulation's to get relief from pent up sexual tension. If all else fails his fist will do.
Here is the part you won't like. You are 14 years old. You are having illicit adult sexual relations knowing that if your parents find out you will be grounded for life. At least until you are old enough to leave home. You are also the one that gets pregnant if your birth control fails. Knowing this even in the back of your mind effects the safety and security I spoke of. You end up whether you will admit it or not to stressed to orgasm.
You can prove this to yourself by masturbating. Go into your room, lock the door, put on some music and make love to yourself. IF you reach orgasm in this manner I will have proved my point. The difference being you are safe, secure, you cannot get pregnant. This allows you to relax and enjoy what you are doing. By the way there is nothing wrong with masturbation. It is a safe and secure way to relieve sexual tension.
Now I could lecture you on the fact that you are too young to be having sex. I don't think it would do any good since you have already started having sex. What I will say is you should sit down and think about what you are doing. If you are having sex just to keep your boyfriend and to make him happy you are having sex for the wrong reasons.
Boys, especially teenagers confuse lust and love. They believe that sex is love. IF you do not have sex with them then you do not love them. Sex is not love. Sex is the culmination of a loving relationship not the beginning.
If you want to prove this to yourself. Tell your boyfriend your not going to have sex anymore. Tell him the danger of becoming a mother at your age is just to much for you to handle right now. IF he says something to the effect; if you won't have sex with him he will find someone that will or he stops calling you. Then you will know it was lust and not love he had for you. A lesson learned for your next boyfriend.
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hey, I have this same problem. The guy always feels bad afterwards cause he cums and we don't it's annoying! Honestly for me i have never orgasmed from sex, I just can't. And I have been with a lot of different guys a lot of times so i know it wasn't just the first! First of all don't make your bf feel bad, tell him it's okay! The only way for me to orgasm is from fingering, so tell him to try fingering you! And while he is doing it tell him what feels good so he knows what to do. It's all about communication, if you don't tell him he won't know! I hope his helps you.
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