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What if I cant cum?
My boyfriend and I have been talking about having sex. We've had phone sex before, but i know thats much different. He once said "I want to make you cum" and after that I got really self concious. I know Im able to cum, I can feel an orgasm, but am I suppose to actually like "cum" as in like liquid stuff? Lol. My boyfriend asked me once and he was wondering if I came alot and I told him yes, but truthfully I dont ever come like THAT. I feel it but its never like....coming out of me... Is it suppose to be? Is there something wrong with me? Im nervous becuase I think thats something that gets him really excited...I can get wet but its never like how he assumes....Im really scared about him being insecure if i dont cum like that and he thinks that its a normal thing for me. What do I tell him?
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Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Trouble Reaching Orgasm?
i'm a guy/18 and when guys say they wanna make a girl cum, they usually mean they want to please a girl to ultimate orgasm. One thing you must understand is that guys have more pleasure seeing a girl having orgasm and moaning and all that then having orgasm themselves.Yes!!!, it's true.And if he really means cum as in liquid form, then I think he means squirting which most girls, if not all can do by simulating the g-spot which is located about 2 inches on the upper wall of your vagina.And yeah, most guys are reallly turned on by that.So you should ask him if he wants you to get an orgasm or does he want you to squirt?
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Theres a big difference between girls cumin and guys comin. When guys cum it goes everywhere.. when girls cum it just gets wet down there... sum girls get really wet and sum girls don't.. Then theres girls that actually do cum like guys sorta but not really it just squirts out a lil bit.. but most girls just get a lil wet down there. Don't be nervous its completely normal.. I hope this helps
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you dont need to tell him anything girls dont cum like guys and if he doesnt know that then..theres something wrong with this picture here lol- girls cum but not alot like guys..guys go everywhere most of the time but girls its just a little bit.
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When he says "I want to make you cum" he could mean he just wants to give you an orgasm. I guess it's the same thing to guys, and in a sense it's the same thing in general. You shouldn't worry about how wet you become, it's the fact that you had an orgasm to begin with that guys enjoy so much. If he does become insecure, reassure him that he's doing the job. Tell him how great it was, and that will make him feel better about himself. If he asks, or seems worried about it, tell him the truth. Honesty is always the best policy. It's normal for a lot of girls.
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If you guys have sex and he is disappointed in how "much" you enjoyed it then just tell him it was wonderful/great/whatever and reassure him that you enjoyed it to the fullest and that it never just "comes out" like his does. You are completely normal in that aspect. Also, try different positions to optimize your enjoyment. That will help. I don't know how old you are, I'm hoping you're old enough to be giving this advice to! lol
P.S. Always use protection or you'll have a little rugrat running around and no time or energy for sex anymore!
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The best thing that you can do is talk to him. If you feel close enough to be getting more serious, then you should feel comfortable with him and he should feel comortable with you and you're feelings. If you can't talk to him and tell him how it really is, then you are not ready to be doing those things with him. You don't want your relationship to be based on sex, and if you don't have a strong "talking" relationship with him then you're obviously not ready. I don't want to seem mean or anything, but that is really how it has to be. Just tell him the truth and if he has a problem with it then its a sign to wait. I hope i said something useful.
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Women experience a series of involuntary muscle contractions around the vagina that may or may not produce vaginal secretion (Getting wetter) when they orgasam. So to answer your question, just because you dont actually SEE cum, like you would with a guy, doesn't mean something is wrong with you. Your quite normal. Just let him know next time the topic comes up, that you don't cum like a man would. No woman does at least none I've ever heard of (except for porno's).
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Are you sure he just doesnt mean cum as in orgasm? talk to him explaining thats what you meant. but seriously, he sounds like he is only in this relationship to have sex with you. i dont mean to sound disrespectfull. i am sure this is well thought out and that you two really love each other and both want this. so i am sure he will understand. not many girls actually "cum". hope you feel better :)
Tianna Audra
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