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Ok, Not too long ago, my best friend and I both liked the same guy. I dont think anyone knew it but us 3. Anyways, the guy (I'll call him Roboert) told me that he liked me. And my best friend was sitting right there. She got really mad because he knew that she liked him alot and he decided to like me. She even got mad at me. Well, she got a boyfriend and everything was cool. But now, they're fighting and she's started talking to Robert more. We're not goin out or anything but, I dont want the same problem to happen again. What should I do? I mean, should I stop liking him for my friend or is she a friend at all if she'd get mad at me for someone liking me??
--Thanks--
~Confused~
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ill tell u what to do and trust me ive been in this situation before what u wanna do no matter how hard is tell ur friend how u feel about this and if she gets upset then she isnt a good friend at all but remember to dont get too pushy or arguemenetive
ill be there for u
me
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Usually, people who put the answers of questions in their questions already know what they need to know. You already know that a true friend wouldn't get mad at you for someone else liking you. Hell, she should be happy for you.What I think you want to know is what to do about it. She IS your friend and you'd hate to have to stop seeing her because of a new interest. That wouldn't be fair of you. Have you sat her down to talk to her about this? Does she know how you feel or are you just sitting back, holding your breath, hoping she'll find someone else again, soon, or that she and her boyfriend will get back together, leaving you to enjoy the splendor of this man's attention and affections all alone? Hmmmm, don't think it's going to happen that way, hon. And even if it does. How are you going to react every time she breaks up with someone new. And while we're at it, what's up with the guy that likes you? Has he said anything in the way of trying to establish a relationship? I think that if you were a bit more sure about what you had with HIM, you wouldn't see her as so big of a threat.
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Well to start with you can't just will yourself to stop liking him... and just because your friend is talking to him does not mean she has romantic intentions, and it seems she's arguing with her honey, but they’re not broken up... you should also not have to "stop liking a guy" because your friend likes him, if the world was like that than it might be pretty confusing, and people might have a hard time keeping relationships or even dreaming of some. It's possible that a dispute might occur again, but in relationships of any kind disputes occur, and well I'm sure you could make it though. You can't change feelings, and should not have to even try for a "true" friend...
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It's unbelieveably common for this kind of crap to happen, and it always causes extreme agony. In fact this has happened to me twice, and I got all upset and depressed over it. It sounds like Robert is playing the field. He wasn't sure where to stand with two girls being affectionate, so he acted like a baby and threw out an emotion to test the waters. Time is a balm with these sort of things, trust me. Within 6 months or a year you'll wonder why you loved Robert so much, your friend will date him and quickly break up, or she'll find another man. You don't have to stop being friends with him for fear of her, but remember how many billions of people are out there. You'll find many friends, probably some a hundred times better than Robert.
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Dear confused,
Your "friend" seems like the jealous type. When shes got a boy/f its okay, but when shes not happy she cant stand to see you happy. I dont think shes much of a friend if she feels that way. Ask her how she would feel if you went out with him. Or you could try getting things together with her and her boy/f shes fighting with. Glad to be a help
-Shay :-)
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Alrighty, Confused, I just got a phone call, it was Junior High. They want you to give them their drama back. But let's adress the issue first, shall we?
You are the only person not in the wrong here. You have three possible plans of attack:
1. Date Robert, piss of your 'friend' and then break up with him three months later when he decides he likes your friend better.
2. Don't date Robert, resent your 'friend', and later hook up with her current boyfriend to piss her off. (Meanwhile Robert dates that weird girl from your English class who writes depressing poetry on her peachy folder.)
3. Wash your hands of this Junior High drama, realize that both your friend and Robert are behaving in a manner that would disgust any self-respecting seventh grader. If Robert was really interested in you he would have taken you aside privately to share his feelings, not make a pronouncement in front of your friend who he knew would be jealous. On the other side of the equation, your friend has a boyfriend, and can't date Robert anyway. She's being petty, possesive and selfish. I'd say your best bet is to talk a little more with that <3 T0T4L HoTTiE <3 in your Math class, and forget Robert exists.
But kudos to you for including a name with your question, Confused. If I had windbreakers, I'd send you one.
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