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Okay, there's this guy at my college, let's call him Jacen. We met at an organization bonfire, and as it turned out, we live in the same dorm. So he comes over and chills in my room from time to time. I don't mind this. I think he's interesting to talk to, and in spite of the fact that he never leaves until an hour after I tell him to, I don't mind his visits. For the most part.
So the other day at lunch, he asked me if I'd like to go to the opera performance with him. Not being able to come up with an excuse not to, and kind of wanting to see an opera anyway (I'd never been to one before, and I'd only seen a recording of a P.D.Q. Bach opera... that doesn't really count), I said sure. He then went on to explain that he had two tickets, and needed a taker for the other one. Why he had two tickets, I don't know.
I know for a fact that he's interested in someone. I don't know who this someone is.
This is slightly disturbing to me.
So- a) how do I know if he's interested in me or not, and b) how do I let him know I like him as a person, but I'm NOT interested?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
a: since he bought an extra ticket to an opera (and those can be pricey), is interested in SOMEBODY, and invited you to go with him, i think he's interested.
b: if you like him as a person and are not interested, i suggest saying something like "i love you like a brother... and, sadly, incest is illegal". or take the normal "i like you as a friend, but that's all" route. whatever.
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Having two tickets to a classy event like the opera doesn't usually just happen, unless he works for some generous corporate sponsor of the opera or participates in radio contests on the classical station :)
Either he considers you to be a fine opera buddy (or a potential convert to opera fandom) or you're being asked out on a date.
Maybe both. My bet is on interested and maybe the former option too.
So, I would guess making it clear how you see things would be a good idea. Gently but firmly (something along the lines of "I think of us as just friends, and I can't see that changing"). The question is when... sometime when he looks to be getting cuddly or after thanking him... or in a quiet moment when walking there or back. Maybe another answerer has a better idea, I know that doesn't narrow it down too much, but if you leave him in suspense... it can get a little cruel in a strange kind of way. He'll be bringing all the romantically-confused-guy stuff onto himself, but not setting him straight is like just walking by a puppy who's tangled himself up in his leash.
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