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humorist-workshop

Empathy :(


Question Posted Monday September 29 2003, 7:38 pm

There's this smart, great, funny, talented, awesome, well-rounded guy at my school that girls would fall head over heels for to date. There's just one problem: he's black, and we attend a predominantly white school. Many people wouldn't have a problem with this, but his parents won't let him date girls that aren't black, and all of the black girls in our area are "ghetto", and he's not like that. My friend asked him to prom and they were both psyched but his parents won't let him go because she's white. He's never had a girlfriend and I feel really bad. Thoughts on this issue?

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Maplesyrup answered Friday October 17 2003, 8:35 pm:
Why don't you ask your friend to go over to her his house for a study date as friends? Maybe she'll grow on the parents and they'll see that she's really nice after all, even if she's not black.

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Draak answered Thursday October 16 2003, 6:16 pm:
I would suggest that he play that he's going to prom stag (alone) and then meet up with your friend there. Yes, he's basically lying to his parents, but the reasons they are giving him are ludicrous.

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zoe. answered Friday October 3 2003, 10:21 pm:
augh, situations liks this piss me off. he can date whoever he wants, he's a big boy and he needs to show it. his parents will get used to it.

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chocolatenutbar answered Thursday October 2 2003, 9:47 pm:
My friend had this exact problem, only the opposite way around. She was white, and she wanted to date a guy who was black. Unfortunatly, her parents weren't all for the idea. Eventually she told her parents just to "suck it up, I'm dating who I want to date" and left it at that. And she dated him, and her parents got used to the idea.

Sometimes it takes parents a little bit to loosen up when it comes to dating, especially interracial dating. These two people have two choices, as I see it: screw the parents, or screw the idea of ever having a relationship. Either way, as their friend, they probably want you to support whatever decision they make.

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Gealach answered Thursday October 2 2003, 2:02 pm:
Well, that is a problem. I wish i could say I have an answer, but I dont. My strong mindedness makes me want to say, "screw them and go out anyway," but I realize that's not probable. My advice is to do what you can. I know that sounds horrible, me suggesting to go behind his mother's back and so on...but that's all I can think of. "Accidentally" bump into each other a couple times or something. Or if you're really against being so secrative...which i understand...just try to deal with the fact that he can't date you. Kind of empty eh? No real advice I guess, but it's the best I got.

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